Story within a blog!

Hey!!

I've started a new blog and its going to be a story but made up of blog posts from the main character.
I know it's different and I would like all of you to take some time and give the first two posts a read and let me know what you think. http://storygoingnowhere.blogspot.com/


I'm still unsure how this is going  to work out and if people will actually like it. I thought I'd take a risk so if you could please follow as well and try and spread the word about it.

Thank you in advance.
Much love!! <3 xxx <3

things change.

Tonight I've been deleting people from my facebook friends, many of them deleted I barely speak to
or never spoke. Never knew why most of the people in school who didn't like me added in the first place.
Some of them have changed and spoke to me but many of them didn't even bother just wanted to bulk up their friends.

But I have realised that so many of us have changed since school, college or even work and that if you were friends with them back in the day you possibly have less in common now and not really know each other.
The ones you didn't have anything in common with back they you may have something in common now its rather weird.

Unsure emotions

I found myself cheer up after the last post because he (my partner) admitted to me he was feeling shit about his appearance and didn't want to be naked in front of me even though I have seen it all before.

So I became happier in myself knowing it wasn't my appearance he didn't liken BUT today I don't know what has made me feel this way but I feel like shit about myself.

My head tells me that I'm fat, ugly, no one in the right mind would love me, I'm useless, etc...

My partners found me in tears due to this but not helped matters by leaving me on my own to go downstairs and do whatever he's doing down there, so now I'm in our room nothing turned on, apart from my phone in complete darkness and silence. This still hasn't made things better but I feel at ease a little because I can't see my body as clear.

I feel I should go see a doctor as I feel I'm depressed and can't get motavated at all. I struggle just getting up in the mornings as I don't know how the day is going to be, I don't want to leave the house because I don't want to see people incase they see my insecurities.

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Don't understand.

Well I can't sleep and can't understand why my boyfriend has such a low sex drive?

You would expect a 22year old up for it whenever but it doesn't seem the case. :-/ I know a relationship isn't based on sex, but its part of an enjoyable one.

I just can't help think is it me why he doesn't want sex. Do I repluse him, am I really that ugly. Is it my weight? I really don't understand what so ever!! :-/

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Sorry

Hey guys!!
Not been posting again have I!! :/ sorry my laptop has broken again and its pain on my blackberry as they have not designed an application for this. :/

Anyways I am good and been busy looking for work again!! Worked at ASDA over christmas period and that fucking sucked but I do have a interview at the hospital to be a Healthcare assistant really want to get into nursing sooo sooo bad!!

So wish me look guys!!
Will def keep updating from now on though! Promise!! Lol xx
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